Today, I’d like to take a close look at the Kool-Aid Man.  I’m not going to focus on his vandalism or how the hell a glass jug could ever bust through a brick wall.  Instead, I’d like to focus on what he is carrying in many visual representations.



If you consider the fact that he is usually seen carrying a smaller jug or version of himself, it raises some very disturbing issues...



   1. Is that smaller jug a Kool-Aid Baby? If so, why is he carrying it by the ear and running?
   2. Is it simply another jug, but filled with his own bodily fluids. Which, sure, if you’re the Kool-Aid man, happens to just be Kool-Aid, but still...that's fucking disturbing.   Imagine me with an Andrew shaped coffee mug that I have filled with my own blood...or worse
   3. Whatever he is carrying, his intention is to feed the contents to children/people.  Now take either points 1 or 2 into account when you think about this and you're left with one conclusion…The Kool-Aid Man is one f’d up dude.